I am too tired to write
My mind is dull from staring a a computer screen all day
It’s barely 7:30 (not even) and I’m ready for bed
Teeth brushed,
Bladder drained,
Covers tucked back,
Done.
I will sleep through this night
I won’t even know I’m here
My mind will be gone
Tripping on its own endorphins
With dreams of fancy
Hopes of being digital free

Free of the logarithms
Free of the advertising
Free of the blue light
Free of that kryptonite feeling

Fumes, the last gasps of energy,
That’s where I am,
Words lost in transmission,
Brain and fingers unable to communicate,
Lungs taking those lazy, heavy breaths
Muscles nearly sighing when they finally stretch out.

Teaching is hard.

Exhaustion is a tough thing,
A sign to quit,
A call to pick it up.

When is it time to “fold in the cheese?”
Or just fold it in…
Never, if you can manage.

Keep moving forward,
Not trying is not acceptable,
“Gotta” play to have a chance

The weight of it all caught up with me today.
Running just wasn’t happening,
Legs, lungs, lethargy all working together
To prevent anything meaningful.

The social stuff, the pandemic stuff, the school stuff
A confluence of life’s issues making the day tough,
One where I felt like not doing anything,
Just sitting watching sports like I should on a Sunday.

But that wasn’t possible, I was left with news,
Something I needed to escape from, the talking heads
Having told me all about the houses burning down
And the lack of awareness by that guy acting as President.

So I ran, passing a gaggle of geese less than half a mile
From home, and that’s when the weight took over.
This route, one I’ve run hundreds of times, owned me,
A few seconds of running, a few minutes of walking.

I got my time in, took a chance with a restricted area,
And made it home for dinner.
The Fugitive was on, so I recited the lines for kicks,
Avoiding anything connected with reality.

Tomorrow will come soon, I’ll have to decide,
Rest or continue pushing my limits,
One thing, though, I’m avoiding life,
Sad, but I am worn out. Maybe I should stay in.

Not up for this stuff this morning,
Sore, tired, grumpy,
The heated seat has its hold,
My friends just ran into the dark,
Sanity soothes on the radio,
And I’ve got nine minutes until
I slip into the cold wet
Of a swimming pool
To go all otter back and forth
Sucking wind and butching to myself
The whole time.
It’s quite a surprise I’m even here,
A man my age, with this energy level
Should be sleeping,
But I’m here,
Lack of everything and all.

Get it done.

I woke this morning tired,
Sun weary, just beaten down
By a non-stop week of family,
Exercise, beaching…
Vacation.
With two more to go,
Sitting this morning out
Became a real option,
I’ll exercise later,
Set up the beach stuff,
Maybe even swim a very little,
But today I’m about restoration,
A little break from the grind
Before getting back at it tomorrow.

Yeah, right.

Tired,
State of mind
Or
Physical property?

Either way,
Mentally gashed
By never ending routines,
Physically worn by the same.

One more week to go,
The threads will unwind,
Afternoons will be free,
Summer won’t be far behind.