I’m not sure how to write this,
I was just caught in a social vortex,
At times traveling through Portland, Oregon,
Others passing through Vegas,
All the while standing in the effing
Self-proclaimed Mushroom Capital of the World.
Back in the day,
My family get-togethers weren’t happenings
Until my uncle and his brothers started wrestling.
A broken rib here lost teeth there,
It was a common thing,
Once one of them put a lampshade on, literally,
The party was over.
Tonight brought those feelings of youth back,
The slurred speech,
The banging buffet,
The overdeveloped cc’s of testosterone
That seem to follow brothers or those
Still living the dreams that are unrealized.
I’m not sure how to convey how great it was tonight,
I’m mean who can complain about such a spread,
Such companionship, the absolute ease of hanging
With people I’ve feared my whole career…
Especially the kind that might throw bicycles
Bust out the walls of a closet
All rock star style in a hotel.
Glad I didn’t know that at the start of the year…
But in this case the boundaries of school and life
We’re separated. I don’t know how
To get my mind around it.
It’s not something I’m used to.
Slow down. It’s all there…
Make a list…
1. It seems cake was expected, not delivered, but not missed either.
That is a testament to the quality of character of this group.
2. Poetic or not, fireworks in a neighborhood are always cool as long as
It isn’t my ‘hood.
3. Everything is better slippery…especially slip and slides. Dishwasher safe…
4. I met a guy named Joe about four or five times. It seems he knew the host.
5. Eddie Murray could hit, Darla. Listen to your husband. What am I saying,
That’s crazy talk. Wives don’t listen to husbands, especially about sports.
6. I only thought keg throwing happened on ESPN. That guy from Iowa is a beast.
Blue minivans work well as backstops.
7. Dogs are some manipulative mofos.
8. When the kegs are flying, the party is either just getting going or nearly over.
I hadn’t been to a dead keg party since college. I hope I pulled my weight.
9. Did I mention BBQ?
10. The last two strides of the Belmont were amazing…
I can’t begin to explain
How much fun I had tonight.
For a jackass who cowers in public,
This had to be the best party in a long time,
Because I was with the kind of people I once knew,
Just having fun without regard for pretense,
Reputation, or ambition.
I was with real people,
My kind of folks.
I know some others who weren’t there,
They would have fit in well,
Too bad they weren’t
For the fireworks,
The keg throwing,
The Crispr demonstration
On how to clone a kid from a parent
While they play corn hole,
It was remarkable.
And now we also know,
There are some challenges
The HR Momma just won’t take…