Bruton Heights Elementary School was my favorite school of all time. I had no idea of the history of the building at the time, I just knew there was something special about being there. My classmates were cool, the architecture was cool, the specials/centers were cool. The whole thing was awesome. In sixth grade, the teachers decided to start a student council. For whatever reason, I decided to run for treasurer. I have no idea how I won that election. My slogan, “Use Your Common Cents, Vote for Chris,” might be the worst play on words ever. Then there was my speech to the class, awful. The rehearsal had me standing up, losing my place at about mid-sentence, and then fumbling with words for about thirty seconds before I sat down with a Nixon like sweat and plenty of words that my mother would not be proud of running through my head. I guess the actual speech went better because I have no idea how it went.
I was the stereotypical politician:
• I said stupid things. “Prizes? We don’t have much money in the budget, but if we want to get something we better hurry, prices at 7-11 are going up all the time.”
• I avoided work. Who counted all of those cans in the recycling contest. My guess is David Haney’s father…
• I took advantage of situations for my personal gain. Fortunately the Haney’s had a little truck, a Toyota or Datsun if memory serves correctly, that we used to haul all of the cans to the recycling center. How about Bruton Heights for cool? We stored mountains of bags of rotting beer cans on school property. Try that today…
• I got to go on trips at “tax payer’s expense.” All of the officers got to attend the SCA convention at Tabb High School. Chuck Robb was there. He seemed cool then, but I couldn’t say how he did as a governor.
The year ended quickly and I never had any interest in running for office again. Once, as an adult, my grandmother made me promise that I would never get elected at anything. I’ll honor her request without a doubt.