Headlines Last 24 Hours

(Note: Rambling incoherence is at the heart of the fake headlines.)

Halloween hysteria hones in
On the logic of rational people
Leaving us percolating in zombie amnesia.
What hath thou last day and lead up
To gluttony
Left for us to forget?

Lone Ranger Recreates Barney Fife Moment
In Southern Corral

Transcripts Show Insight Into Late Filing Egos

Punctuation Patterns Prove Perpetrator A Contraction

Sun And Sick Days Continue Rising In New Jersey

Rug Sales Decline As Razors Improve

Ah Halloween
With its supernatural bend
And sugar induced mayhem
Maybe things will begin to calm
After the elections

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